This article is authorized to be reprinted from: small ten points (ID: sdikid)
By Cush
A few days ago, a mother in Guangdong shared a pregnancy and postpartum diary on an online platform to record the changes in her body during pregnancy and postpartum.
But because of the stretch marks on the stomach, it was judged by the platform that it did not meet the specifications.
Current limiting, card review, and even blocking. Finally, the video was removed and the account was banned.
Soon, “Should the stretch mark footage be cut off” became a hot search, causing a heated discussion.
Netizens do not understand:
Those soft porn videos with vulgar content and vulgar content every day, with so much traffic but not blocked;
And this kind of fertility science video, but it makes a big fuss, it is cut and screen, and even the title.
Then urging women to have two or three babies, while labeling the body changes during pregnancy with shame.
It’s all part of the body, the vest line is touted, and the stretch marks cause discomfort.
It’s so easy to ask women to have children and women to be beautiful.
This double standard is really hard to understand.
Always praise the greatness of maternal love
but never mention the hardships of childbirth
The most ironic thing about being banned for sharing stretch marks is:
We have been celebrating the greatness of maternal love, but we never mention the hardships of women becoming mothers before and after childbirth.
Blocking mothers’ stretch marks, will birth become traceless birth?
A lot of stretch marks, far scarier than the video that was cut at the beginning.
Some mothers have very deep and long incision scars on the scary lines, and some mothers even have hyperplasia of the incision, protruding a large piece of meat.
What many young women may not know to this day is that stretch marks don’t grow slowly, but pop up suddenly.
Some time ago, I saw a mother share it in surprise. I felt my butt snapped. I looked in the mirror and found a lot of new lines… Feeling the bumps…
Source: Xiaohongshu@your_name.
These stretch marks can be cropped out, but those reproductive damages will stick with a woman for a lifetime.
For some people, stretch marks are irreversible.
Some mothers say that they have stretch marks and unresolved pregnancy moles on their abdomens, and their belly is loose and sagging. In summer, I dare not wear cool clothes.
Stretch marks are a relatively small price to pay for many fertility injuries.
Urinary leakage, mastitis, rectus abdominis separation, pubic separation, pelvic floor muscle relaxation, uterine prolapse…
Many mothers are silently enduring the escalating post-natal sequelae of these painful indices.
“Since I gave birth, I ran a little for two steps, coughed, sneezed, my underwear was wet, it was hard to open my mouth, when I had a cold and cough, I was wearing a sanitary napkin every day… …”
“After giving birth to my child, my pubic bone was separated, and I spent more than 40 days in a wheelchair. It hurts to stand up while sitting.”
And the shielding of the facts of these fertility injuries, it is actually such a shameful thing in the eyes of others;
Praise the greatness of maternal love all the time, but dare not let people know where the greatness is;
Even for mothers who have given birth, the best compliment is actually “it seems that she has never given birth”, blindly promoting the recovery of girlhood after childbirth.
This is disrespectful to women.
Stigma about fertility
Women of every generation
Behind the clipping of the stretch mark footage, it is the social subconscious that makes women feel ashamed of fertility damage.
Isn’t it normal to have the bodily changes that accompany life? What is there to be ashamed of?
A woman is being asked to conceive and give birth, and shamed when her body begins to change.
The real shame is the deformed thinking and concept behind it.
Mr. Sixth Floor, an obstetrician and gynecologist, talked about why many elders keep silent about the pain of childbirth.
He analyzed, One is that many elders ask her to speak, but she may not be able to speak clearly.
In clinical practice, he encountered many middle-aged and elderly women with postpartum leakage, laceration and other sequelae:
They don’t know anything about it, they can’t describe it, they just feel uncomfortable.
Second, they think it’s very shameful, and they find it difficult to talk to their children.
He has met many middle-aged and elderly women in the clinic. They are not open to male doctors, but they are unable to open their mouths to everyone.
The third is that women express the pain and suffering of childbirth, which is often defined as hypocritical and weak.
So they were forced to endure, and they were used to it.
Indeed, I once saw the blogger “The Famous Wicked Girl in the Galaxy” share the experience of a 56-year-old aunt.
That was the first time the blogger had incontinence surgery tvt, and I remember very clearly that the 56-year-old aunt was clean and well-behaved.
However, during the physical examination, there was a look of shame on her face that she had never seen before, and when she took off her pants, she knew why:
She had a thin towel under her pants, fifteen years.
It turned out that my aunt had given birth four times, and even the simple movement of sitting down to standing up would leak urine.
Because the same is true of my mother, I only thought that “every woman is passed down by word of mouth”, and she was ashamed to seek medical treatment.
In order to avoid embarrassment in public, she put on a towel regardless of summer or winter for fifteen years. She was always afraid that others would smell her urine.
At that time, the blogger was in great pain after performing urinary incontinence surgery on his aunt.
This operation only took 20 minutes, but my aunt endured it for 15 years.
20 minutes, 15 years, those two numbers are like two mountains.
Thinking of the physical and psychological torment mothers experienced during those long years of childbirth crushed her emotionally.
What’s even more poignant is that even in today’s age of childbirth sequelae, many young women are still suffering.
I have read a message from a young mother who tried to ask her husband several times that the stretch marks on her belly are so ugly, and she wanted to make a nice tattoo to cover it.
Actually, stretch marks are not pathological manifestations.
She uses the uterus as the soil and grows the pattern of plant branches and leaves.
Stretch marks, valgus ribs, anterior pelvic tilt, urinary incontinence, false hip width, uterine ptosis, breast ptosis…
These are glorious marks, not shame, and deserve to be presented truthfully, treated kindly, and distressed.
There has always been a feeling that speaking out these radiant marks makes young women child-phobic and older women anxious.
On the one hand, making people aware of these can reduce body discipline for pregnant women created because of lack of awareness;
Allows women to make informed choices for themselves.
On the other hand, fertility damage has long been under-reported.
Too many older women afflicted by it are too shy to seek medical attention or even know which symptoms can be improved with treatment.
Only when these reproductive injuries are seen and understood over and over again, and only when these popular science voices are heard and spread over and over again, can women truly benefit from fertility.
fertility impairment
Needs to be seen
Under the topic that the stretch mark video was cut, the highest voice was:
Not only should not be cut, but more real videos of prenatal and postnatal.
Because if you can’t feel these things intuitively, women’s reproductive situation will not be truly seen, and people will not understand women’s hard work.
Women of gestational age have the right to know about possible future changes in their bodies before giving birth;
Postpartum mothers have the right to speak out about the postpartum injuries and postpartum sequelae that their bodies are experiencing.
Like two days ago, Professor Chu Yin shared that his wife’s health was obviously not as good as before after the second child.
It’s easy to get sleepy, working all night before having a baby, but now I can’t stand it.
Children are not only physically, but also psychologically damaged by childbirth. And no matter what kind of damage, it should not be covered up.
Sharing fertility damage will not make people “fear of fertility”; the fear of the unknown will increase women’s resistance to fertility.
Fortunately, more and more women have the courage to speak out, and more and more women are not kidnapped by shame and face up to and affirm their value.
I saw a mother say, “I also have stretch marks. I didn’t remove the stretch marks when I was taking a maternity photo. I think this is also a mark and should be kept.”
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“I often stroke the ten-centimeter scar on my stomach, it feels like a very good medal – a cute little life was born because of me!”
And a set of stretch marks pictures on the screen “The Earth”, with the text “From that moment, she changed from a flower to a piece of land, and she wants to be the land of her children. ”
Source: Weibo @Eleven11dream
Yes, those stretch marks with thousands of ravines are nature, vitality, the imprint of women’s birth of life, and the honor of life blooming here.
Just like courage without heroic color is the most real courage, facing birth damage such as stretch marks is the real tribute to the greatness of maternal love.
The barren earth can’t bloom, there are only cracked lines and unseen silence.
With the progress of social civilization, we should not be more and more aware of what women have gone through during childbirth, while not allowing them to speak out.
Only everyone sees what fertility brings in plain, undisguised, unglamorous:
Women will be able to weigh the pros and cons and make real choices after seeing the full picture, rather than being forced into fertility.
(Some pictures are from the Internet, invaded and deleted) Author: Cush, The source of this article is small ten points (ID: sdikid), professional and practical parenting dry goods, Bedtime stories, parent-child reading, beautiful mothers, and selected good things. At ten o’clock, I care about my children and my mother more.
