From collapse to rebirth: My fifth year of “dead battle” with breast cancer

Ms. Huang looked at herself in the mirror a few days ago. The shoulder-length medium-length hair has now been completely shaved, and she wants to keep it at the same length again, I don’t know how long it will be…Thinking of this, she no longer stretches She couldn’t stop, tears poured out like water that opened the gate, the pain of illness and the grievance and annoyance in her heart made her feel like she was falling into a swamp little by little, and she couldn’t get away from the sadness for a long time. 01Cancer that was only “heard of”,it happened to meIn the spring of 2017, at that time, Ms. Huang was retiring to the second line to be idle at home. She had nothing to do to help with her granddaughter, and occasionally< /span>Going out to climb the mountain, chatting and drinking tea with the sisters, the life is very leisurely. Who knew that in the early morning of April, Ms. Huang accidentally touched a pimple the size of peanuts on her chest. She felt very strange. After thinking about it carefully, it should be It’s not a matter of one or two days. You have to go for an inspection as soon as possible to feel at ease. So, after a brief wash, Ms. Huang went directly to the nearest community clinic. Unexpectedly, this broke her peaceful and comfortable retirement life…That day happened to be in the community outpatient clinic doing two cancer screenings (breast cancer and cervical cancer), Ms. Huang With a “try it out” mentality, she did a B-ultrasound at the doctor’s advice, but the results were not optimistic, and she was advised to go to Zhengzhou Maternal and Child Health Hospital for further mammography. Ms. Huang left the outpatient clinic with a heavy heart, and the doubts in her heart became bigger and bigger: what happened? Will it be wrong? Is it a good outcome or a bad outcome? With these questions, she came to the Maternity and Children’s Hospital. After mammography, she found that the results were still not optimistic, and the probability of being diagnosed with breast cancer was 500. %! The results of two consecutive “bad conditions” made Ms. Huang anxious, “I want to get treatment as soon as possible!” She said firmly to the doctor. However, the doctor of the Maternal and Child Health Hospital said that the current medical conditions in the hospital only support surgical resection, and there is no way to carry out follow-up treatment. It is recommended to go to other major hospitals. Accompanied by their daughters, they first went to the First Affiliated Hospital of Zhengzhou University for relevant examinations, and then took the examination results to Henan Cancer Hospital for consultation. The treatment plans given by the two hospitals were: Surgical resection followed by chemotherapy, radiotherapy, and endocrine therapy according to the situation. After some tossing, Ms. Huang slowly accepted the fact that she was ill, and was no longer obsessed with running back and forth in multiple hospitals and confirming repeatedly. Compared with spending time on suspicion, at this time She would rather get treatment as soon as possible! In order to facilitate follow-up treatment, Ms. Huang finally chose to receive treatment at the First Affiliated Hospital of Zhengzhou University. On the second day of hospitalization, the hospital arranged an operation for her, and the postoperative pathological staging results showed that it was invasive breast cancer stage II. “I didn’t expect that cancer, which I only heard about from my colleagues before, happened to me…” Ms. Huang sighed deeply as she recalled. 02< span>Sometimes, the collapse is only for a moment“Let me go, let the trouble go.” I saw a man holding his luggage and sweating slightly on his forehead. He hurriedly walked through the crowds of the hospital, looking at the ward number on his mobile phone while looking around. The moment he pushed open the door of the ward, Ms. Huang was stunned. The panting man in front of her was her husband, who was in a foreign country not long ago, but now he is standing in front of her hospital bed. “I told the company about your situation. They bought the fastest flight for me, and I came first as soon as I landed.” He said after taking a breath. Due to her husband’s work, the couple lived abroad. During the period when she was not sure whether she had cancer or not, Ms. Huang kept her husband a secret and did not want him to worry too much. She did not tell him the truth until she was informed of the diagnosis of breast cancer after surgery. Looking at the haggard appearance of his wife lying on the hospital bed, Ms. Huang’s husband was very upset.It’s a taste, the fatigue of running around has become insignificant under the visual impact. After the operation, Ms. Huang underwent 6 courses of chemotherapy, 28 times of radiotherapy and endocrine therapy. Fortunately, her physical fitness is usually good, these treatments did not cause much damage to her body, and most of the side effects can be improved in a short time: sometimes the white blood cells are low, and they are relieved by diet and whitening needles; occasionally, measles, Eczema will recover slowly after treatment in the hospital; sometimes I will catch a cold due to low immunity, but after a few days of diet and medication, it will basically heal… These side effects are acceptable to Ms. Huang, the only thing that “breaks” her is hair loss! “The hair fell from a few strands to a handful, I was very worried at that time, but the doctor said it was normal, and chemotherapy rarely does not cause hair loss. Think about it anyway. It’s better to shave your hair.” Although it has been nearly 5 years, Ms. Huang said this time, her voice could not stop choking. People always say that “hair is like a woman’s second face”, and it occupies a very important position from youth to maturity. When we were still young and ignorant, it was the dream of many little girls to have long, lush hair. It shared our individuality and squandered our youth. As we get older, hair has become a “business card”, which will Our unique temperament is on full display. No matter what age you are, hair is precious, and it is the same for Ms. Huang. The day she shaved her shoulder-length hair into a bald head, it was the first time she broke down and cried since she was diagnosed with cancer. She didn’t know whether the tears that came out of her eyes were because of her reluctance to give up her hair, or whether it was because of her reluctance to let go of her hair. Originated from a backlog of complex emotions. Sometimes, the collapse of an adult is often in an instant, and no one can help, but to overcome it. 03< span>All good things will come as scheduled! After radiotherapy and chemotherapy, in order to better control the disease, Ms. Huang started endocrine therapy under the advice of the doctor, from November 2017 to the present , One pill a day, I have been taking it for almost 5 years. During this period, Ms. Huang took medicine on time every day, did housework, cooked three meals a day, occasionally helped relatives to take care of children, took a walk with her family in her spare time, and gathered with her sisters Small talk…days seem to be returning to the back-to-the-linelife that used to be, but with a twist. She is more free and easy. No longer worrying about how much hair she lost all day, no longer afraid of other people’s eyes, “Anyway, it will grow back slowly!” She understood that long or short hair is only temporary, and only by letting go of her worries can she continue to be happy. She’s stronger and more optimistic. In the past, she always thought that cancer was a single-choice question of “life or death”, but now she understands that even if she has cancer, she can live a good life. The label of “cancer patients” shackles the right to enjoy life. She understands breast cancer better. In her spare time, Ms. Huang will read books and learn some basic knowledge of breast cancer; she will also go to the “Miaojian” APP to communicate with patients, read the anti-cancer experience shared by others, and experience the power of “warming in a group”. She knows more about family and friendship. Her husband’s travels in a foreign country, her daughter’s busy running, and the warmth of her relatives and sisters, all wrapped her tightly in a loving environment. Although the road to fighting cancer may be full of thorns, these warmth will be the most advantageous weapon, leading her to overcome thorns all the way. Recalling the past five years of fighting cancer, there are joys and tears, pain and collapse, but Ms. Huang has never given up on herself. She regards these ups and downs as “treasures”, from time to time. Use it to motivate yourself and comfort others at the same time. With such a strong will, it is not a problem to fight cancer. I believe that all the good things will come as scheduled!

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