I recently read a book called “Worthy of the World”, written by a 90-year-old Japanese grandmother named Hengzi. The book describes many positive aspects of life, work, marriage, and parenting. energy events.
I agree with many aspects, but I personally don’t agree with Grandma Hengzi’s views and practices on marriage.
In a brief description, Grandma Hengzi and her husband met through a blind date. Her husband is an ear, nose and throat doctor. Soon after the marriage, the children’s grandmother discovered that her husband was an alcoholic and often invited friends to dinner generously.
Such behavior prevented Grandma Hengzi’s husband from paying Grandma Hengzi’s family expenses. At first, Grandma Hengzi thought about changing her husband, but she didn’t succeed. In the end, Grandma Hengzi gave up. Instead of changing others, it is better to face life optimistically and live on her own.
So Grandma Hengzi started a widowed life and raised 4 children. What I can’t understand is that if you know that your husband is such a person, if you expect your husband to change when you give birth to your first child, why continue to have children when you find that they can’t change.
Divorce may not be possible in Japan because of female status, but pregnancy can still be avoided. And even if it is unavoidable, since the author is so positive and optimistic that he can accept widowed marriage, why does he not have the courage to face the negative impact of divorce.
As the text says, children are well educated and live well. The relationship between Grandma Hengzi and her husband was eased because her husband could no longer continue to treat patients due to alcoholism, so he retired at the age of 65, and then became gentle and began to spoil his grandson.
It’s really not very understandable. As an old man who lives to 90 years old, even if you get married at 25 years old, is it really worth you to endure such a marriage for 65 years?
So sorry, I personally think the book sucks. An optimistic life is needed, but it is not optimistic not to solve the problem, but to adjust the mentality. In my opinion, the author’s conception of marriage is not very desirable.