It’s 520 again, have you found someone to say “I love you”?
Don’t worry if you can’t find it. According to the “China Statistical Yearbook 2020” [1], the unmarried population is about 210 million, including 127 million males and 83 million females.
You see, you’re not alone, and it’s no big deal.
But the number of singles and one husband is destined to lower the marriage rate.
Since 2013, the marriage rate in my country has been swooping downward, and the result of the “six consecutive declines” is: The percentage per thousand in 2019 hit a new low of 6.6‰[2].
So here comes the question,
Why don’t young people like to get married?
Marriage has always been a financial issue, past and present.
It’s not just about money, it’s about whether it’s “worth it” in economic terms.
Choosing the other half from the vast sea of people requires high material and spiritual costs to find and wait. To make people want to get married, these costs must be recovered after marriage and even more beneficial .
But the reality is: 1+1 of ordinary people may not be ≥2.
Data shows[3]: Among the single youths in first-tier, new first-tier, and second-tier cities, 40% are moonlight, and as many as 76% in fourth- and fifth-tier cities.
Imagine that a family composed of two moonlight clans has a high probability of making ends meet. Besides—
When you are single, you can rent a house, but when you get married, you have to take out a mortgage;
When you’re single, your time is yours, and you can’t help yourself when you’re married;
When I was single, I could feed the whole family and not be hungry. After marriage, I signed up for N cram schools for my children and worked hard to save money.
Women, also consider the obstacles to careers and the impact of housework on the mind and body.
In addition, the “divorce cooling-off period” requirement further increases the risk that “investors” will find it difficult to escape. Choosing to get married is more and more difficult.
Image source: Zhanku Hailuo
Marriage is essentially an “exchange of interests” where both parties need to meet each other’s needs.
Former marriage model: “Men take charge of the outside, female lead inside”, pay attention to “Men’s wealth and women’s appearance”, the man is responsible for making money, find a woman to think about how to spend money, and then have a few children Anti-aging; women are responsible for being beautiful and virtuous, find a man to earn enough family expenses, and then have a few children to prevent aging.
But with economic development and greater awareness of equality, the traditional concept of marriage has changed.
Social status, economic base, good looks… are no longer necessary conditions for mate selection.
Modern people who get married pay more attention to the spiritual aspect. They want a happier intimacy than when they were single, enjoying sweet love and long-term company., warm psychological sustenance.
That is, “a plump purse” and a “good-looking skin” are difficult to impress me, and “interesting soul” is the driving force for marriage, and I am willing to explore the secrets of ordinary life with TA hapiness.
As for raising children to prevent old age, I am sorry, but I am paying endowment insurance, and I am optimistic about nursing homes with specialized care.
True love should be the resonance of the same frequency between two souls, not a compromise forced by economic and social pressures.
Single is the best choice if the loved one never appears.
Of course, this requires confidence, and social development has given more and more people this confidence.
“2019 White-collar Living Status Survey Report” shows [3]: The proportion of “unmarried and single” among white-collar workers is the highest, at 40.18%.
These singles have received better education and basic economic security. They pay attention to the quality of life and are willing to enjoy personal independence and freedom. They care more about self-worth than contributing to the family. .
When a person takes self-realization as a motivation for life, his attention will mainly focus on his work and himself, and his personal emotional life will naturally be ignored.
Where there is demand, there is supply. In this context, the “single economy” is rising, and “one-person” products are full of tricks:
A bear will be placed across from a person eating hot pot;
Going to the amusement park alone can take the fast track;
Single bed in a hostel when traveling alone…
Even having a baby is almost done alone, so why marry for the sake of marriage?
Image source: Zhanku Hailuo
Many people resist marriage because it’s not the time.
Beginning of the post-80s generation, universities have shifted from elite education to mass education, and the number of people receiving higher education has increased significantly, resulting in the delay of first marriage and first childbearing age.
Ordinary college students, 22 years old for undergraduate graduation, 25 years old for master’s degree, and 28 years old for doctoral degree. If you work for a few years after graduating from a bachelor’s degree and then take a postgraduate entrance examination, your age will only be older.
According to the traditional concept, studying is more important than starting a family. How can you get married before you finish your studies? Without years of struggle, where will the down payment come from? Where does “wife ben” come from?
At the same time, those born in the 1980s and 1990s have been the center of the family since childhood. They are cared for more. After marriage, their lives will undergo great changes. Father, mother, true independence has just begun.
Should I take on the burden of the family early, or be a salted fish who will not eat the fireworks for a few years? They make up their minds.
As for people whose original family is not harmonious, even if there is a mine at home, the fear of marriage and life will make him feel tired and unloved. After weighing, he chooses to watch outside the besieged city.
Therefore, some people believe that more and more people are actively single is an alternative sign of social and economic development.
It’s not that they don’t take marriage seriously, it’s that they take it too seriously and are reluctant to follow through.
As an individual choice, being single is understandable, and others have given unprecedented recognition and tolerance, but in the mainstream social environment, being single is a way of life that is not advocated.
Survey data shows[11] that 60.4% of single people are still looking forward to a good love. Even if they are a firm single party now, they may change their obsessions in the future.
“No~It’s so easy~You can find a~talkable partner~”
Self-growth cannot be stopped at any time, and the same is true of happiness.
Image source: Zhanku Hailuo
(Source of all animations in this article: soogif)
Dian brother, no one confessed today,
Don’t tell me you all got gifts, okay?
References
[1] National Bureau of Statistics. China Statistical Yearbook 2020[J]. Yearbook, 2020
[2] Ministry of Civil Affairs of the People’s Republic of China. 2019 Statistical Bulletin of Civil Affairs Development [R/OL]. Ministry of Civil Affairs of the People’s Republic of China
[3] Zhaopin. “2019 White-collar Living Conditions Survey Report” [J]. Report, 2019
[4]Liang Li. Female celibacy, a helpless choice. Marriage and Family, 2003, 7:43-44
[5] Ke Yiping. Reasons and trends of female celibacy. Ideological Front, 2004, 30(2):30-34.
[6] Zeng Junlin. Marrying or being single is a question. Sichuan Province Qing, 2006, 6:41
[7]Liu Zhiyu. An Analysis of the Psychology of Single Women. Journal of Jilin Provincial Institute of Education, 2012, 28: 141-142
[8] Tian Yun. An ethical review of the phenomenon of single women in contemporary China [D]. Shijiazhuang: Hebei Normal University, 2008
[9] Zhao Yanyan. Ethical Analysis of Female Celibacy [D]. Suzhou: Suzhou Institute of Science and Technology, 2015
[10] Wang Lei. Analysis of the characteristics and trend of unmarried youth in China. Journal of Chongqing University of Technology (Social Sciences), 2018, 32(10): 48-56
[11] Zhang Rui. The Single Economy: The Blend of Rejuvenation and Personalization. Securities Times, 2019, 11/5/Page A03
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