Working hard in the workplace, in a flash of ten years, I gained the house, car, and child of my dreams… But I suddenly lost my health. At the age of 35, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, which happened once in my life. Sharp turn!
Hospitals have no shortage of stories, especially cancer hospitals. There are endless joys and sorrows, and endless tears of human affection. Because of watching so much, I often feel that my story pales in comparison.
Compared with those really dangerous cancers, breast cancer seems a little insignificant. Compared with those terminally ill patients who are struggling in the front line of life and death, I am grateful for the blessing of Goddess of Luck.
But there are often sisters who are curious about my experience, and sometimes I also sigh that when I see a doctor, I can see going to the hospital to work, turning the divinely revered male god-in-charge doctor into my beloved teacher and friend, This disease is indeed a bit strange to look at.
Image source: Zhanku Hailuo
After the diagnosis, I cried with my husband
It all came so suddenly when I received the terrible breast cancer, I “washed my face in tears”.
When the attending doctor looked at my mammography film and said, “Hey, so young!”, my tears almost didn’t burst out, and one by one rambling thoughts began:
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“The child hasn’t gone to primary school yet, and what will happen after there is no mother? My husband can’t count on him. In my concept, he basically has no ability to take care of himself. If he can’t take care of himself, the child will be Don’t count on it!”
“Our parents have supported us all these years, and I’m gone, so they and my husband probably won’t be able to live on!”
“Will my husband marry again? Would you like to help him find one in advance? In this way, I can also appreciate my general knowledge, and I can be better for my parents and children in the future, and I can also find one myself. Don’t worry…”
It’s funny to think about it now! So, when I talk to my husband seriously about these issues, he berates me for being “neurotic”,
The phrase “you are here, your home is there, and if you don’t have this home, you will be gone”, let’s hug and cry together!
A disease beats the “seven-year itch”
Science and technology men are like this. Usually they are clumsy and have no words, but they don’t lose their chains at critical times.
He wanted me to swear that I would take good care of my illness, no matter how much it cost. Hey, from acquaintance and falling in love to getting married and having children, the year of being sick has just arrived at the “seven-year itch” of our marriage.
Before I got sick, we had a cold war for a long time, is God going to use a disease to save my marriage? Thank God, if it weren’t for this disease, I really thought I would have vowed to “go with the wind” like the lyrics.
I am very fortunate. I am very happy now. Maybe God wants to make this test a little more solid, to verify whether my husband really does what he says. Facts have proved that he is very reliable.
My husband has no complaints during my treatment days. The most commonly used targeted drug for breast cancer is trastuzumab. At that time, it was not included in Shanghai Medical Insurance, and I was not able to apply for the cancer foundation’s buy 6 get 8 free. I swiped the card without saying a word, but my flesh hurt.
I thought to myself, I must cherish the days that come back at such an expensive price, but I can’t spoil it.
Cruel: No breast conservation, risky reconstruction
With the support and encouragement of my husband, the sense of responsibility and mission of the family arises spontaneously. Just like a soldier, I need to fight for my family who love me. Surgery, radiotherapy and chemotherapy are nothing, as long as it can save lives and make the storm more violent!
The attending doctor told me after confirming the diagnosis that the tumor was not located well and was frequent, and it was definitely impossible to preserve breast milk, which meant that I would lose the most precious part of a woman, and I was depressed and worried. Sad, I really can’t face it for a while. Every time I arrived at the hospital, I would subconsciously stare at other people’s chests, and get strange looks from passers-by.
Afterwards, when the doctor asked me if I wanted breast reconstruction, I felt like my whole life was lit up! Considering that there are too many parts in my body that need to be saved, the attending doctor kindly helped me formulate a surgical plan of “total incision + latissimus dorsi + prosthesis + contralateral breast lift”.
This operation is not a small one, and it looks painful. My patients admire me very much. I just feel that I am really lucky to have this operation. Everything is not perfect, to get a certain need to pay a price, toss is certain.
If you care about your body, it means that you still have requirements for yourself, yearning for beauty, and being willing to toss for it is also a positive attitude towards life. If conditions permit, why not give yourself a chance? You know, rebuilding not only the body, but also the confidence for a better life in the future.
Friends all say: You are younger and more beautiful now, what you know is that you are sick, I don’t knowDao thought you went to Korea for plastic surgery!
Tumor surgery is transformed into plastic surgery, so this disease can have this opportunity!
Image source: Zhanku Hailuo
Fear itself is scarier than chemotherapy
How scary is chemotherapy? Only experienced can you have a say. After walking through it, I found out that the most terrifying thing is actually the feeling of terror itself, and the imagination of the unknown.
No one will study cancer, study chemotherapy, without getting sick. Most people’s understanding of chemotherapy usually comes from film and television dramas and news that need breaking points to create a tragic effect. But it is false to say that chemotherapy is not difficult, and some people do not have much reaction.
In fact, with the continuous advancement of modern medical technology, the overall safety and tolerance of chemotherapy have been greatly improved. I dare not speak of other cancers, but for breast cancer, most of them are no problem, it is not difficult to get through.
Of course, people with different constitutions have different reactions to different drugs, but mentality is also a very critical factor. For example, if you are bored at home by yourself, you are often prone to thinking wildly, and you will experience the various uncomfortable reactions caused by chemotherapy in a more nuanced way by lying in bed all day to rest.
In addition, the excessive care and love of family members may often become a shackle and make the patient fall into the cage of fear. Because you don’t have to worry about anything, in the end you only have to worry about your own illness!
Everything is the best arrangement
After breast cancer surgery, treatment was phased out and I was in recovery.
The first question is, what about work? I’m only 35 years old, and my career is on the rise. Before I got sick, the leader just promised to be promoted, and the company’s benefits are quite good. To go back or not to go back? Can you go back?
This may be a problem faced by many convalescent patients, especially young patients.
Without working, what should I do with my life? If you work, how should you face it?
There is no standard answer! Everyone has an ideal answer in their hearts, but it takes a lot of effort to really achieve this ideal state.
However, a good attitude can be a panacea. After the treatment, I joined the visiting team of the Rehabilitation Volunteer Ward in Yankang Salon of the Cancer Hospital, and signed up for the psychologist’s study class. The hospital leaders gave me the opportunity to work in the psychological assistance center established by the hospital, which can serve more cancer patients and their families.
Although I only do a lot of trivial things every day, it is a great blessing in life to be able to do something that I really like in my heart and that is suitable for me.
So, I’m glad that this disease came so early, when I was in my right year, it was the best arrangement!
Image source: Zhanku Hailuo
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