a spectacle of contemporary society, There are always people punching themselves online, and a group of people watching.
You need to punch in for reading, punch in for study, punch in if you don’t shop online, and punch in to control how much money you spend in a month.
On the days when I couldn’t travel, I made myself a tourist attraction and called it: self-discipline.
And under these check-in content, there are always many shameful comments, while reflecting on themselves How can I be so lazy, and I envy how others are so self-disciplined.
Lack of self-discipline has become an original sin.
But the word “self-discipline” itself is the biggest lie of this era.
Self-discipline: From OKR to PUA
As long as a person wants to do some self-improvement, “self-discipline” is often the first thing that comes to mind, and a person trying to be self-disciplined often starts this way.
First of all, he will think of a very vague goal, such as losing weight, studying, or even just “becoming a better version of yourself”.
Then ta will download some self-discipline APPs according to the “self-discipline strategy” of Xiaohongshu, Weibo or station B, buy some yoga mats, hand accounts, pens and notebooks, etc. Wait, make a detailed plan for yourself, such as getting up early at 7:00, exercising for half an hour, learning to clock in, reading for 30 minutes, going to bed at 11:00, and planning to clock in every day.
After struggling for a few days, he will find that he cannot complete his plan like a robot, and then start to struggle with “why only I can’t do it” , resulting in some self-loathing, and then start to PUA yourself.
First I want to say, if you can’t do your own Self-discipline goals are normal.
Because in the company, this kind of “self-discipline” is generally called OKR, and it is only worthwhile to work hard when the money is deducted if the completion is not completed. .
“Self-discipline” in the market is basically associated with “the best self” and “the look that everyone envies”. Self-discipline means freedom, and self-discipline means success.
The first person who equates “self-discipline” with “good” and success is not Xiaohongshu, but your mother.
When you go to school, parents use “other people’s children” to pull and trample you. You must use words to be more self-conscious. You don’t need to urge you to do homework. How many papers can be written in how many days…
A summer vacation plan for elementary school students found online
For a long time, “self-discipline” has often been singled out in the experience of successful people.
For example, in the legendary “Wang Jianlin’s schedule”, he gets up at 4 in the morning, takes a 5-hour flight to Haikou after morning exercise and breakfast, and takes part in an event. After the series of work, I have to fly back to Beijing and continue to work after 7 pm.
He worked more than 12 hours during the day.
“Wang Jianlin is so self-disciplined, how can you not work hard?”
But I don’t know since when, “self-discipline” has become the password of wealth for some people.
Those self-disciplined marketing
The self-discipline that attracts the crowd has already marked the price in secret.
In the track of self-discipline, there is never a shortage of successful lecturers.
It also sells books, courses and communities.
There are even protein powders, face masks, eye creams and wallets.
The logic of “self-discipline marketing” is very simple and rude. Knowing that self-discipline = success, buying their stuff = self-discipline, so buying something = success.
As the saying goes, there are too many stationery for poor students. When it comes to self-discipline, it is not the self-discipline that will make you successful, but the order you place and they will succeed.
Of course , criticizing “self-disciplined marketing” is not to deny the value of effort.
Effort is of course important, but sometimes, it is not the key factor in success.
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upmaster @Quanxihe had a conversation with a headhunter friend, in which he mentioned a sentence :
“(Someone got a high position in a well-developed big factory, (but) in fact this high position is driven by the entire industry or the entire macro economy, not created by individual effort. ”
The times make heroes, the right time and the right place and the right people, “the right time” and “the right place” are often ignored because they cannot be controlled by human beings, but they are one of the necessary factors for success. 1.
The self-discipline “sold” on the market today often exaggerates the value of hard work, giving ordinary people an illusory hope, and throwing all failures away It all boils down to not enough effort and self-discipline.
The picture is taken from station B@Quanxihe
But why is self-disciplined marketing so popular?
In essence, we are too anxious and too afraid Failed.
Not disciplined = failure? span>
In the past two years, I have often seen news of elementary/middle school/college students doing extreme behaviors because of some trivial things. Some people always say that children’s psychological capacity is too poor.< /span>
But as the whole society becomes more and more utilitarian and people’s standards for “success” are getting higher and higher, it is really difficult for children to exercise a A strong heart.
The advantage of the Internet is that it can connect everyone’s life together, but the disadvantage is that it connects everyone’s life too closely.
in In the past, it was difficult for people to imagine “success” beyond their own perception, and the reference was limited to what they had seen or heard of.
But now, the “standard of success” has become the “standard of successful people”, which is the annual salary of one million, the number of flats in the school district, and the income earned before the age of 28. If it is less than xx million, it is better to go back to the hometown.
The network shows people from different regions, different family backgrounds, and different living conditions, but the display is very one-sided, so it seems that everyone seems to be the same age, But in fact the difference between man and man may be greater than the difference between man and pig.
There is no anxiety without comparison. Many young people are worried because they see too much Many peers are better than me, but I can’t be as good as them anyway, and I have to participate in social competition with them, so I start to feel anxious.
But in fact, we are often competing with people of similar level to ourselves. Those outstanding peers participate in the competition, and an ordinary person who is “not self-disciplined” is temporarily not eligible to participate. .
So ordinary people who pursue the “self-discipline” that is marketed will only be involved in the same level of ordinary people, and it is difficult to really catch up to those excellent peers.
The anxiety of young people today is not because of lack of self-discipline and lack of effort, but because of the wrong reference.
Don’t worry about not being disciplined anymore
Whether we work hard and whether we succeed or not, all reference should be ourselves, and even the right to decide whether or not to self-discipline should belong to us.
I once saw a Weibo netizen say this: Struggle is very important, and self-conciliation is also very important.
In Douban’s “Anti-Social Clock” group, more than 70,000 people are sharing their “anti-clock” life.
Someone resigned from the factory at the age of 30 and went to the farm to work as a blueberry picker;
Some people graduate from graduate school at the age of 29, and some go to graduate school at the age of 29; Under the guidance of elementary school children, I learned to ride a bicycle.
The so-called “social clock” is what age does what to do, but everyone’s social clock is not exactly the same, and the “success” that everyone can achieve will not be the same. exactly the same.
As the founder of the “Anti-Social Clock” group wrote in the group introduction:< /span>
“Someone graduated at 22, but waited 5 years to find a stable job. Some became CEO at 25 and died at 50; CEO, and then live to be 90 years old.
Some people around you seem to be ahead of you, and some people seem to be behind you, but in fact everyone is in their own way Time zones have their own pace.
Don’t be jealous or envious, life is about waiting for the right moment to act. So take it easy. You’re not behind, you’re not ahead. Everything is on time in your own time zone that destiny has set for you.”
References p>
Douban Anti-Social Clock Group
“Self-discipline” is the best selling illusion of this era span>
Creative team of this article
Author| Chong Shan
Planning| Chongshan
Editing| Chongshan
*The picture comes from the Internet, if you have any questions, please contact